Bee's Corner
Where have I been
I know it’s been a long time, but I lost the urge to update the world in the form of a long detailed scroll. Pretty sure that the most interesting thing in my life right now (other than cutting off all my hair and dealing with a slight mullet) is the fact that I’m finally doing classes at school that I enjoy and I’m reading 50 Shades of Grey. Anyone who has read this book, most likely female, knows that it is hypnotizing, soft core porn (maybe getting more hard core as I keep reading). But seriously, this book is like having sex-ish…and it makes you feel naughty.
My life status is best described as “manageable” these days. I work Tues-Fri as a nanny, and I love it, but money is tight and being a grown up is hard, so I can’t wait to finish my school and dive deep into the event business.
I am still very much in love, even though it has been really up and down lately, we are making an effort to not forget how important our love and friendship is to each other.
I have been thinking a lot these days, how is it fair that I lost the one person who I would trust to advise me through life’s obstacles. Truly the only person who would have understood me because we were so much alike. Hate it hate with a gut wrenching pain.
I have a friend who recently found out that she is pregnant and she’s a couple years younger than me. It’s so scary and I feel sad for her. I have been hearing the same advice lately, which is: “your 20’s are for you and your 30’s are for family”, and I completely agree. If you would have asked me a couple of years ago when I wanted to be married I would have said 23, and have kids? 24/25. Thankfully I have been enlightened by advice and experience. I am selfish and want to spend as much time with Taylor, just me and him, travelling and being young, before we have any children (marriage can come any time after 25). I would never want to trap him and steal his youth (or money) because that’s just not fair. Going back to my friend, luckily she is strong and determined, and despite her young age, I am sure she will be a great mom. Also I can yet again be selfish and get in all the baby snuggles and smelling that I want without the commitment or loss of beloved sleep
I know this is a scattered blog, but there is a lot on my mind. I am going to try and write daily so I can filter and concentrate on possibly one thought.
xo
